intentions and obsessions

I love symbols and totems and objects with meaning. If it were comfortable, my arms would be filled from wrist to elbow with crystal bracelets and encouragement in the form of those Little Words Project charms. My ears are pierced eight times and hold hamsas and evil eyes and Ganeshas. If I didn't share my home with others, every surface might be covered in candles and rocks and statuettes and framed phrases, filled with reminders of courage and protection. My quest for a peaceful, pure soul is fueling the capitalist economy.

Knowing my love of these sorts of things, my eight-year-old made me a gift:

Of course what she meant to write was, "You Got This," but this hilarious, haunting phrase is what came out instead..."This Got You." Chills.

It got me thinking... what if all the good I'm trying to manifest is actually being undermined by the desperation with which I'm trying to have it? What if my intention has become an obsession...a thing that makes me clenched and small and nervous instead of big and free and fearless? What makes "You Got This" become "This Got You?"

Maybe I'll scale back on the totems. Maybe I'll try to hope without holding on too tight.

This bracelet gift from my daughter can keep me connected to what matters more loosely, less seriously.

How do you stay true to your intentions without making it obsessive?